You see? Even the mighty can fall.
As great as it all was, I knew this day would come. The good news is when you're aware that a day like this is possible you are at least somewhat ready when the emotion hits you. I think it's how one gets through these tough times. A part of you inside knows that these moments come and go and so having faith in ones self helps power through.
Here is what I know about myself. I crave attention. I don't necessarily think it's in an unhealthy way. But I do love the interaction with another person be it physical or simply intellectual. I like interaction, it's why I'm good at my job.
Now I'm the first to say that life needs to be a balance so too much of anything isn't a good thing. This is a moment I need to get through... and get through it I will (in my worst Yoda voice).
I'm not going to write on and on about this because I don't think it'll make me feel better. I just need to deal with it. I am sure there are a lot of you out there who wrestle with it. I don't think I'll ever be comfortable with being alone... I don't think I'm built that way. I can tolerate it, which is important... but I don't have to like it.
Time to shut my eyes and get a sensible night's sleep.
Goodnight you lovely people.
A Message to Apologists From a Survivor
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