So... I'm blogging now -- Does that officially make me a blogger? I, in essence, have opened my internal diary for those who care to learn about what's going on in my head (however, I will be the first to admit I keep things pretty general... I believe some things are meant to be private) ... so I'll ask the question again... does that make me a blogger? I guess? What is a the goal of a blogger? Is it to be discovered as some great new voice of a generation? Is it with the hope that some network executive will be so entertained by the talent oozing from the text they'll be inclined to turn the blog into a TV series? Is it to meet chicks? Is it to keep from going insane? Is it to keep from going insane? Is it to keep from going insane? Is it -- aw, you get what I'm getting at.... whatever the reason (which I don't even think I know yet) -- I'm here. I titled my blog "A Punch In The Face" not to be funny... although I get a kick out of it when someone of Facebook becomes a fan of my FB page for APITF and it says "so-and-so" likes A Punch In The Face. I titled it that because I feel I have experienced my share of ups and downs in life and I truly feel that some days are no different to getting a punch in the face...
So, how did I get here... do you care?
On Sept 15th, 2009 -- I had a moment... I was knee deep in my marital separation and the changes happening in my life... and I had a moment -- and I
But in the days following I mellowed out and reported back with some more blogs about what I was feeling. It's like I was returning to the same ice cold pool and was trying to ascertain the best (least cold) way of getting in... there never is one.
In the beginning, I chose the normal shallow end route (the most difficult by far) where I step in inch by inch, shivering as the cold blog pool water slowly moves up to my waist. This is the point of no return... Once we commit past the waist line there is no going back -- meanwhile, my blog friends who are well into the pool are splashing around, coaxing, goading, what have you.... I'm faced with a choice. Turn around, go inside, and play with my Atari 2600 -- or -- dunk myself in and commit to it. I'd say I've chosen the latter. Today, I jump in the pool without worry and am learning to swim, while also learning what fun can be had... Marco Polo, Cannonballs off of the diving board, splash fighting, seeing how long I can swim underwater without coming up for air... and dare I say peeing in the pool without anyone noticing (SIDE NOTE: I remember swimming at summer camp and being told not to pee in the pool and that there was a special chemical in the chlorine that would change color if you did... needless to say that as a child there was lots of urinating in the pool going on and the pool never changed color) -- you get the picture.
So now I'm posting blogs on a somewhat regular basis (I try for weekly at the very least) - and I'm enjoying it... first and foremost it's got me writing again - something I've put off for a long time.. as some of you may or may not know or care for that matter. Writing was something I used to enjoy and for about a five year period actually got paid to do (PAID!) -- I got chewed up and burnt out by it, and I just didn't have it in me to do it anymore. In the last year, with all the changes in my life, and new found free time, I've opted to return to it in this new form. I'm less concerned with telling a narrative three act story at this point and am just free balling it for the time being. My hope is it can lead to something more concrete. I'm discovering who I am as a writer and what my voice is. I used to write as a means to avoid having to dig too deep - funny stuff, but nothing groundbreaking. In the past I tried returning to that style of writing and it's just not who I am anymore (part of me does miss that voice though) - Now, it's sort of like an emotional puberty if you will - Now, is the time to write for me. I used to write to gain the approval of others (and while there will always be a part of it that's about approval from the masses - hence my FB page A Punch In The Face that links to this... it's no longer the sole purpose). I will write no matter what because I like it. If I find followers who enjoy reading it... great. It is encouraging when people you don't know you comment on a posting because they simply relate to what you've written. To me, that counts for a lot. The same way I discover a film or album or artist that I feel an instant connection to and I enjoy for me -- not because it's what my friends are listening to -- and with that I will take a brief moment to highlight some of these --
Things I love:
Paul Thomas Anderson's "Magnolia" and "Punch Drunk Love"
Eels albums "Electro-Shock Blues" and "End Times"
Bruce Willis as John McClane
(seriously... whoever heard of a hit that had the word "herb" in it)
And thanks to Hipstercrite, I've come to love this Talking Heads song (read the posting, then listen to the song)
Of course, there are a lot of things I love outside of pop culture - first and foremost, my kids...
Seriously, whenever I'm in doubt personally or professionally, I look to those two and can immediately cast self-doubt aside. They are simply... the best. I am truly blessed to have two amazing kids and it's a result of two very dedicated parents.
Okie Dokie - It's Sunday... so now I would like to bid you all a fond farewell for the day... I have some work I need to finish, was thinking about checking out "Exit Through The Gift Shop" and some drinks later on tonight at Roger Room (see, it's fun playing with all this blog stuff - linking and what not).
Oh, wait -- I forgot to tell you my mission statement.... the mission is... there is no mission -- I'm just going to keep writing.